A: Next week, we'll both be watching the Champions League final on television. Its a sour taste but Im sure well enjoy it when were back in the dressing room.". A: He turns off the PlayStation. Hate Jokes Arsenal You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake, and an Arsenal Fan. Understandably, Arsenal fans were quick to comment on the club's jibe as they revelled in the joke. Real Madrid's Toni Kroos appeared on a podcast with his brother, Felix, who slammed FIFA's decision to award former Arsenal goalkeeper, Emi Martinez, the Best Goalkeeper gong, saying it was a . Share it! "A large amount of our best weapons and munitions have just been captured, sir.". Whats the problem with Martin degaard?Odegaard wouldnt shoot Hitler if he had a gun. It said it was to weak. Q: What do you call a dead Gunner Fan in a closet? Love my club. Sunday was a rather bizarre event. What is Arsenal calling their gay team, added to promote equality?The official name will be Upthearsenal but fans are expected to call them by their nickname of The rear Gunners., What is Arsenals mascot Gunnersaurus saying?I survived extinction for this fucking shit., A man stopped another man in the street and said, Can you help me? FREE BETS:GET OVER 2,000 IN NEW CUSTOMER DEALS, One user tweeted: "Arsenal have lost their manners. Johnny says; 'No, but I was too embarrassed to say he played for Tottenham Hotspur.' ", "Nope", The copper replied, "I already know that under every Arsenal cap is a cunt!". Arsenal JokesA Spurs fan and an Arsenal fan get into a car accident, and it's a bad one. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. It sure is hard to be an Arsenal supporter. Finally, things might be starting to turn our way! Here is an unforgettable collection of Arsenal jokes and banter, from their Champions League run to the mocking from nearby clubs like Liverpool and Tottenham. Last season, during a match against Reading , Gunners supporters chanted non-stop for Rocastle for the first 10 minutes of the fixture . Enjoy the team's latest comic relief and have a laugh at their expense, from FIFA to Scunthorpe! The Rivalry of Tottenham Hotspur - Arsenal. . On her way home she notices that only one radio station works. the other one wore no knickers and she supported Arsenal. She immediately turns the car around and heads back to the dealer. ''Did you visit the Wailing Wall? But in amid the delight and schadenfreude enveloping the red half of north London, there is a lesson, too, for Arsenal fans about the sport's cyclical nature. It can sustain you when times are tough, as they have been for Arsenal in a season when Wenger's position and the direction of the club have been scrutinised and pulled apart like never before. A policeman was driving along one day when he saw a car in a ditch.When he looked inside he saw a deceased man with a spurs shirt on, a dildo up his arse, a pink tutu on, and a lot of over-the-top make-up. A man is sitting in a pub with his Jack Russell dog on Tuesday night. "Climb in, Father. Mark White has been a staff writer on FourFourTwo since joining in January 2020, writing pieces for both online and the magazine. The primary cause of the rivalry between the two arose out of their decision to move from Woolwich to Highbury in 1913. Again she speaks to the car radio"Country Music". The priest climbed into the passenger seat, and they continued down the road. Get the best features, fun and footballing quizzes, straight to your inbox every week. I want Arsenal to win the Champions League.Santa: So what color of the dragon are we talking about here? Even though he was certain that he had missed the guy, he still heard a loud THUD. For further details of our complaints policy and to make a complaint please click this link: thesun.co.uk/editorial-complaints/, Tottenham were trolled by Arsenal for their lack of trophies on the Gunners' online store, Independent Press Standards Organisation (IPSO). It is one of football's immutable laws, to be ranked alongside Germans winning penalty shootouts at the very top of the list. The rude-abega. He phoned her up and said "what the fuck's going on? "Great idea" says the second cat "I support Hartlepool. Potter: Chelsea players back me amid poor run, LIVE Transfer Talk: Chelsea keen to open talks over Gvardiol, Leaders Napoli suffer shock loss as Lazio go 2nd, Dortmund beat Leipzig to go top of Bundesliga, Spirit make NWSL history by signing 15-year-old, Sunil Chhetri's controversial winner against Kerala Blasters explained: by the laws, and Chhetri himself, Arsenal target Caicedo signs new Brighton deal, Bengaluru FC win 1-0 after Kerala Blasters FC forfeit match, Sources: Firmino to leave Liverpool in summer, Raul and Valverde are keeping Madrid prodigy Alvaro's feet on the ground, Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information. What if Tottenham was a Game Thrones house?Their motto would be False hope is better than no hope.. Did you hear about the ref who was flashed by a soccer team?He saw arsenal. A: Santa Cazorla Suddenly, the driver saw a Gunners supporter walking down the road, and he instinctively swerved as if to hit him. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy. The two examples show that football fans are capable of behaving impeccably, because usually it's one or two morons ruining it for everyone else. In such page, we additionally have number of images out there. Lukas Podolski walks into a sperm donor bank in London Entering your story is easy to do. It's another one of football's immutable laws; a binding force holding Arsenal in place: Never too good. Why did Antonio Conte buy his team all lighters?Because they kept losing all their matches. The receptionist replies All of the sudden Tom Thumb says, "You know, how do I know I'm the world's smallest man? Lucy Pinder, Chris Packham and David Frost all make the cut of famous Saints fans (some more famous than others), but probably the most famous must go to Craig David. ", So the reporter starts again: "Gooner git kills family pet". A subscription makes a thoughtful gift for both family and friends. Q: What's the difference between Frequent Flyer Miles and Tottenham Hotspur? We know its important but its only Spurs. "Why I'm proud to be a Liverpool supporter. Ive only had him for like 20 months.. "Well, it says on your record that you're a useless wanker.", It's North London Derby time. A booming voice welcomes them as they walk through the doors. They said lets split it based on the soccer clubs we support. "Intelligence reports indicate that the latest additions to the Ukranian arsenal are damaged and outdated, and many won't pose any threat to us at all." Coach Ivan plays on passion but walkoff is a step too far, Transfer Talk: Bayern still keen on Kane despite new Choupo-Moting deal, Reiten's, Maanum's parallel paths in Norway intersect in League Cup final. A: They're both empty from the neck up. ?The accused.Best Jokes About ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan with half a brain?Gifted.Jokes Arsenal Football ClubHow do the braincells of an Arsenal fan die?Alone.Jokes ArsenalHow do you make an Arsenal fan's eyes light up?Shine a torch in his ears.Funniest Arsenal JokesWhy should you not allow Arsenal fans a coffee break at work?Because it takes too long to retrain them.Jokes About ArsenalWhat do you call the Arsenal team standing ear to ear?A wind tunnel.Funny Arsenal jokesWhy did the Arsenal fan get sacked from the M & M factory ? Spurs haven't won a trophy since beating Chelsea in the 2008 League Cup final. . Even though he was certain that he had missed the guy, he still heard a loud THUD. The last title won on a Spurs ground? So the guy from Manchester says, well since I'm from ManCHESTer, i'll get the chest. The picture looked completely different a couple of weeks ago with Mikel Arteta's side sitting above Spurs in the Premier League table ahead of the North London . Q: What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet? Ouch. What two Tottenham players make a Liverpool goalie?Alli-Son Becker. The Manchester fan said I'll have the chest A: You paint Red Devils on his dick and he won't beat it for 4 years! If you're searching for Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans topic, you have visit the ideal page. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. (Wenger who? 49 Votes "Thats what happened and its a shame as its just a game of football at the end of the day. A: The accused. If you use a smartphone, you can also use the drawer menu of the browser you are using. Be it the home match against Leicester City in the season 2015/16 or the away match in Europa League R16 at Zagreb in season 2020/21, Spurs find a way to cheer their rival fans.In the current season, Tottenhams last-minute failure against Sporting Lisbon extended Antonio Contes dreadful champions league record. 58 Votes Well it does now. One day while driving along, he saw a priest. See if this plane turns upside-down will we fall out?". Arsenal fans still celebrate in song the glory years when they enjoyed title victory on enemy territory at Tottenham in the Double-winning year of 1971 and again under Arsene Wenger in 2004. A: So Tottenham supporters can get laid too. A: Because you can park in the handicap zone! Read ourTransfer News Live blogfor the very latest rumours, gossip and done deals, Moment Aston Villa's Leon Bailey inhales 'laughing gas' after all night party, Mason Greenwood's England future revealed after rejecting country switch, Nicky Butt quit Man Utd as he couldnt stand players beating him to team, Man Utd considering THREE options for Mason Greenwood if he stays at club, News Group Newspapers Limited in England No. 0 Comments. There are also arsenal puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls. Q: Why don't they drink tea at White Hart Lane? Tottenham are simply incapable of finishing above their rivals; the football gods will not allow it. Johnny comes to the front of the class. Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale has revealed the squad still have "scars" from the painful events of last season. A: Nice tattoo ", Another said: "The fact Arsenal have to put that on their website shows how threatened they are of us nowadays. The Sun website is regulated by the Independent Press Standards Organisation (IPSO), Our journalists strive for accuracy but on occasion we make mistakes. View our online Press Pack. A booming voice welcomes them as they walk through the doors. A: Dress her in a Manchester United jersey! Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. ", The reporter starts again: "QPR fan saves friend from horrific attack. "Oi," she says, "the bleedin' radio in this motor doesn't work! Knock, knock. Little Johnny is last, and finally the teacher calls on him to talk about his dad. Q: What's the difference between onions and an Arsenal supporter? A: A good start! Arsenal have won 13 titles to Tottenham's two the last of which was lifted in 1961. If you're searching for Tottenham Jokes For Arsenal Fans topic, you have visit the ideal page. (Emery who? A Compilation of best jokes on Arsenalis given below. A: The bucket. What do Arsenal and Tottenham fans have in common?Theyre both obsessed with Tottenham. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate. ", The reporter asks: "Who do you support, then? Why do so many housewives love Arsenal?Because they stay on top for ages and then come second. What does Tottenham joining a European super league feels like? Entering your story is easy to do. 'Of course I wouldn't!' Surely God wants us to drink this and celebrate our good fortune.". Arsenal has been in the Champions League for 18 years straight and hasnt won it, what are they gonna miss?The anthem. ", Meanwhile one simply stated: "Quality from the Arsenal website.". A big cheer goes up as the screen shows West Ham 1 (Maradona 10 minutes) Tottenham 0 He is beating Spurs all by himself!Anyway, a few more beers later and the game is forgotten until someone remembers, It must be full time now, lets see how he got on! They put the TV on. "Then," says Mary, "I'd be a Tottenham Hotspur supporter." What's the bad the news?" And he got very depressed. Never too bad. What is the similarity between Arsenal on top of the EPL table and an elephant on top of a tree?Nobody knows how it got there but everybody knows how it will fall. (Gunner who? Emmanuel Adebayor ", Another messaged: "This is such a good marketing technique to get more clicks on their website. How many Arsenal fans does it take to change a lightbulb?None. For other inquiries, Contact Us. replies Arsene. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh. The Liverpool supporter said I want the liver 'Look at this, dear. What do you say to a Spurs fan with a good-looking bird on his arm?Nice tattoo. The teacher is now angry. Why did Jesus join Arsenal?He wanted to join a team where everyone is called Gabriel. Whatever the reason for Tottenham's collapse, it gave Arsenal fans a rare excuse to self-combust in laughter and waved them off for the summer by gifting them the most enjoyable moment of the 2015-16 campaign. Be realistic.Arsenal fan: Okay. The first is a Manchester United supporter, the second an Arsenal supporter, and the third a Spurs supporter. At a local derby between Arsenal and Spurs last season, a spectator suddenly found himself in the thick of dozens of flying bottles. Enter your account data and we will send you a link to reset your password. I'll give you a lift!" A: Because the cup's always in Manchester! He has to wear a support Arsenal. Suddenly the train went through a tunnel and, as it was an old style train, there were no lights in the carriages and it went completely dark. You have a gun with two bullets. Why do ducks fly over Emirates Stadium upside down? The car radio automatically switches to classical music. Arsenal are to allow their goal keepers, to train without a mask, I love it, this from the official website. The former Arsenal striker appeared to mock Tottenham during a punditry appearance on French television. Arsenal's crown. Q: What do I have in common with Arsenal? "I'm going to give Mass at St. Francis church, about two miles down the road," replied the priest. 'My daddy is a dancer at a gay bar. The teacher is now angry. Twice. Why dont they drink tea at White Hart Lane?Because all the cups are in Manchester. Instagram - Facebook - YouTube@SoccerManiak801. Why is tea so expensive at White Hart Lane?Because they dont have that many cups. Three aged soccer fans enter a church. He rushes over, introduces himself and takes out his pad and pencil to start his story for the next edition. Taking enjoyment from the travails of rival clubs and players is football's dark matter: a constant force, essential to the very structure of the universe, but lurking murkily in the background. A: I cry when I cut up onions Washington should change their name to "Senators," and Cleveland could become the "Steamers.". There are three friends. 40 FC Barcelona Jokes You Cannot Share With A Cule, 80 Football World Cup 2022 Jokes To Cheer Soccer Fans, 50 Funny Arsenal Jokes You Shouldnt Tell A Gunner. He then remembered the priest, and he turned to the priest and said, "sorry Father, I almost hit that Tottenham Hotspur supporter." Then he hands the bottle to the Arsenal fan. Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? Q: What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Spurs fan? Like the massive whopper that he is, Richard Keys somehow managed to blame the incident on Mikel Arteta's actions on the touchline. To inquire about a licence to reproduce material, visit our Syndication site. if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); 'The season's almost over!'. It only receives one station! "Yes" replies Lukas "you should have my details on your computer". Plus tips on how to play better and interviews with the biggest names. A girl named Mary has not gone along with the crowd. Jessica Amlee Tottenham fan Joseph Watts, 35, has pleaded guilty at Uxbridge Magistrates' Court to assaulting Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale on the pitch after the North London Derby against Tottenham Hotspur on January 15. A: A cheat. Did you hear about Arsenals 6th consecutive season in Europa League?They are going to visit places we have only seen in Bible to play football. Q: Did you hear that Tottenham Hotspur doesn't have a website? A: I cry when I cut up onions Q: Why do people like driving a car with a Gunners fan? Theres nothing to worry about, lad, said the elderly chap standing next to himIts like the bombs during the war. "Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. However, the real challenge for Wenger in what could well be his last season in charge of Arsenal is to try and snap the team out of the feedback loop they have been stuck in for the second half of his reign. I will eat the heart What is the difference between Arsenals players going to Chelsea and Chelseas players going to Arsenal?One goes to retire while the other goes to win trophies. ARSENAL have sent social media into meltdown after brutally trolling Tottenham's 'empty trophy cabinet' on their official store website. What should you do? A: They can't string three "Ws" together. After though, Mikel Arteta dragged them all away and got them instead to celebrate with the away fans, hilariously having to take extra care to remove Granit Xhaka from the situation. Not really knowing what an Arsenal supporter was, but wanting to be like their teacher, hands explode into the air. Our website always gives you hints for seeing the highest quality pics content, please kindly hunt and locate more enlightening articles and pix that fit your interests. To receive credit as the author, enter your information below. "Funniest Arsenal FC JokesOne day Tom Thumb, Snow White, and Quasimodo are sitting around talking. Any suggestion that supporters celebrating second place were incorrect to do so betrays a lack of understanding of the specific context, and from a broader perspective, the very essence of what makes football what it is. A: So blind people could laugh at them too! Q: What's the difference between Tottenham supporters and mosquitoes? What did the guy do when a kinky girl asked him to humiliate her?He bought her a Tottenham shirt. A plane with 5 passengers was about to crash mid-air and there were only 4 parachutes.The first passenger is Cristiano Ronaldo: Im the worlds best footballer, and my fans still need me. This service is provided on News Group Newspapers' Limited's Standard Terms and Conditions in accordance with our Privacy & Cookie Policy. Q: What is the shortest book in the world called? 'Jokes About ArsenalWhy did God make Arsenal supporters smelly?So blind people could laugh at them too!FC Arsenal JokesWhat do you call 100 Arsenal supporters at the bottom of a cliff?A good start!Arsenal FC JokesWhat do you call a dead Gunner Fan in a closet?Last years winner of the hide and seek contest.Funny Arsenal JokesWhat do you say to a Gunners supporter with a good looking bird on his arm?Nice tattoo.Jokes ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan that does well on an IQ test?A cheat.Arsenal Funny JokesWhy do housewives love Arsenal?Because they stay on top for ages and come second!Arsenal Funny JokesAt Highbury, what is the difference between the words disciplinary and football?Disciplinary is the only one associated with the word action.Arsenal JokesHow come Arsenal fans dont fall asleep during a match?The smell of their ground keeps them awake.Jokes About ArsenalWhat do Arsenal fans do after Arsenal wins the Champions League?They put away their Play Stations.Jokes About ArsenalWhat do you call an Arsenal fan with half a brain?Gifted.Arsenal Super JokesWhat does a 3 pin plug and Arsenal Football Club have in common?Theyre both useless in Europe.Joking About ArsenalWhat is the second highest selling item in the Arsenal souvenir shop?Horlicks.Arsenal Hate JokesThe seven dwarfs are down in the mines when there is a cave-in.Snow White runs to the entrance and yells down to them.In the distance a voice shouts out "Arsenal" are good enough to win the European Cup. What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet?Last years winner of the hide and seek contest.